(Part 2) What do some language learners Succeed and others fail?  

Exhaustion forced me to change my thinking. 

I was hiking up a giant mountain with my friend.  For hours I was sweating under the load of my backpack.  “When will I get there?”, I kept whispering.  Eventually, I became too tired.  I couldn’t look at the mountain peak, so I just stared at my feet - and tried to do one step at a time. I didn't know it, but that was a critical moment to my success - I had switched from a goal to a routine.   

In order for language learners to build confidence they also need to switch from a goal to a routine.  Building competency (doing something well) boils down to an undramatic step by step daily routine.  

Wait! Aren’t we talking about building confidence? Correct. But, the quickest way to build confidence is to build competence.  And we build competence by using our goal to design a routine.  Then we throw away our audacious goal (and the confidence to achieve it) and focus solely on the routine.  

Let me show you why competence is the quickest way to confidence.  I’ll attempt to prove it with two (hypothetical) bets.  

Which one would you choose?  

Juggling 6 balls is incredibly difficult, but drinking liquids is complicated, too. But, we all (hopefully) have developed the competency to drink liquids,  And the competency creates confidence.

Large language goals cast long shadows.  And it’s easy to loose our confidence in those shadows.  So now that you’ve made the goal - ignore it.  Forget about confidence.  Just work the routine, every day.  Only focus on the step for today.  Keep your eyes on the routine.  And eventually, one day, you'll be confident. 

“Ah yes”, you might say, “I’ve been doing step-by-step, day-by-day routine for a long time.  But, I’m not improving.  So, that proves I can’t do it!”.  

Perhaps my cat can help.  One day my cat was wrestling with my hand, as we did often.  Up to that point in her life, she thought my hand was the real opponent.  But, this time she stopped mid-fight, her eyes slowly moved up my arm and our eyes locked.  In a flash, she lunged at my face and smacked me in the ear - and ran away.  Winner - cat.  In that moment she realized that I, not the hand was the real opponent.    

Language learners, like my cat, need to realize that the real opponent is their routine.  It’s easy to hit ourselves when feel like failures, but start hitting the routine, instead.  You’re fine, you’re talented enough. It's your routine that needs analysis and revision.  That’s all.  If that requires professional assistance, then do it.  The critical point is, the problem is the routine, not lack of talent.  

Or perhaps you say:

“My friend is better than me.  That proves I’m not good at languages”

But, are you really comparing apples to apples?  Have you done the exact same routine as your friend?  Do you have the same material and methods?  Do you have the same focus and time commitment? I’ll bet that if you did exactly the same thing as your friend, you’d be at a similar language level, or perhaps even better than your friend.  

Henry Ford (the founder of the Ford Motor Company) said it about as well as anyone, “Whether you think you can or you can’t, either way, you're right”.  

That’s how important thinking, and confidence, is.  It’s not that words have magic, it’s just that words are thoughts and these thoughts create feelings that move us forward or pull us backwards.

You have an audacious language goal, and that’s exciting.  Now, forget the goal and work the step by step daily routine.  Make confidence irrelevant.  Build competence and you’ll have all the confidence you’ll need.